Sonnensegler.de

All this effort we make, it has to be good for something, in the end, right? So that we can see the turning point. Or any point at all. I’m waiting for all those things to end, no matter what, even the time until the bus arrives, I’m waiting for it to end. I can’t influence things, I know that, but is it normal doing all this waiting? Actually, my life hasn’t proven itself so far. It’s okay. I can live with that. Can I ? I’ve done it before. Humans are adaptable. So tough, no, more than that, dilative. Is this the reason I’m so tired all evenings? Because I’m dilated from one finger to the other on the other hand? Yeah, actually that’s exactly how I feel. Tired, very tired all the time and slow inside. And I HATE explanations. I HATE to explain myself. Why are people always asking, asking stuff all the time, curiously — I think I can’t even be silent without having anyone to ask what’s going on. Guys, nothing’s going on, okay? And please stop asking, please stop judging, please stop looking, stop every damn thing. And a word to myself: Stop being another you. Sarcastic word back from my other self: Yeah, good idea, I’ve never come to that. Good you reminded me in time. Ha ha.

People I like are people who don’t ask. They just don’t. Because they know. And even if they don’t, they don’t feel the urge to force any convenient truth out of you. Especially those looks kill you. I like people without those looks. Instead, I’d like people with a smile and a nice word. Any stupid word, like “want a tea?” or “you look good today” or “sit back, I’ll take over from here”. Oh yeah…